Waltham crash to spin kings

Waltham started this home fixture full of confidence after two comfortable wins in recent weekends. However, a below par performance from the team was ruthlessly exploited by a very capable Goring side.

Waltham started the match once again without a lot of their much needed talent in the form of allrounders Dan “the 12 second prop” Owen, Andrew Jackson, Andy Van Zyl and the evergreen Chris England. However their cause was helped by the inclusion of Harmeet “Inzaman” Singh, Andy “my average is better than Dan Owen’s” Smith and Gary “Jonty Rhodes” Aldred.

On a balmy English summer afternoon, Captain Paul Gearing could only watch as the visiting skipper called correctly and inserted Waltham in to bat on what looked to be a low slow pitch.

Waltham’s own version of the talismanic and injured Michael Vaughan is Paul Ashton, and together with Nick Philp, they put on a respectable 32 runs for the first wicket against some probing Goring bowling.

This was the high point of the day for Waltham as Goring turned to spin and discovered a Waltham pitch that openly embraced turn and added a touch of variable bounce to the mix.

The Goring wicketkeeper was performing miracles behind the stumps as Goring’s version of the spin twins Clarke (2 for 42 off 15) and Crawford (5 for 33 off 15) bowled deliveries that spun, spat and hissed venom.

Ashton (14) was the first to go followed by Philp (18) and then Johnson (2) who was plum LBW to a delivery that appeared to have struck him outside the line, pitched outside leg and was not going on to hit the stumps…needless to say he was about as happy as a chicken in KFC.

The carnage continued with Gearing departing to a top edge (14) and Faisal “the Fizz” Shah being deceived by a ‘scud’ for an enterprising 19.  Harmeet Singh (9) was undone by a delivery that kept so low it had earthworms scurrying for hard hats.

A brief respite followed as Ziggy “Tom Tom” Kiani applied himself and saw off the threat posed by spinners Clarke and Crawford. He fell for a defiant 5 and was followed by Hill for a disappointing 16 and the Raupindi Express for another duck in the infamous Waltham Gallery of Shame.

Tailender Andy Smith joined the vastly experienced Aldred at the crease. Aldred, who is not known for his batting - but he is certainly enthusiastic about it, managed to get a few lusty shots away to lift the scoring to 114 all out.

The Goring reply got off to a stuttering start as Shah had opener Derrett bowled in his first over. But any chance of a Waltham come back was short lived as Goring profited from some wayward bowling.

Johnson and Arif in particular, chose to bowl a line and length that was far too straight to trouble the Umpire with petulant LBW appeals. Hill was having another quiet game behind the stumps by his own standards, as he could no better read the bounce and turn with gloves than he had with the willow.

Two further wickets were taken as Arif had Smith caught behind for a well compiled 34 and Gearing picked up the wicket of Caulfield (30) from a brief spell of “boomerang” swing bowling. This briefly bought a smile to the face of local drunkard Matt Nebbett who was rewarded for a fine spell of heckling and various misdemeanours from the sidelines.

Goring were good value for the win although Captain Gearing will be left rueing the lost toss and poor performance of his side. He will have a week to pick his side up and get them ready for the challenge of Pinkney's Green at the Waltham home ground in a 13:30 start.

scorecard

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